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One Year, One City

October 5, 2005

Today marks my one year anniversary of living here in Nashville.  This
is the longest time I’ve spent in one place in the last two years.  I
followed up college with a summer in Minneapolis , then found myself at home for about 9 months.  I left to spend that summer in Los Angeles  in early June of 2004.  The following October 5, 2004 I moved to Nashville, Music City.

I’m getting the feeling that my restlessness is going to be something
I’m going to have to deal with.  It’s something I’m proud of and hate
all at the same time.  I felt it creeping in on me two weeks ago.  I
love my job, but I don’t love monotony.  It occurred to me that my job
was becoming monotonous.  I can’t stand feeling like a machine.  And
when that happens something deep inside me moves to just below the
surface of my soul.  It knocks softly at first, but gradually gets
louder until I have to answer: it’s the urge to run. 

Just so I know, I will not be running.  At least not
geographically.  No, I have to work it out.  I have to stay and
discover why my soul gets restless. Why I always feel the need to leave
and begin again.  Bob, a co-worker of mine, would tell me that it’s
because I’m an Aries, the youngest of the astrological signs.  I will
therefore always have a need to begin again, always remaining ‘young’
and struggling to become wise.  One who will always learn the hard
way. 

Good thing I’ve got Jesus to counter-act Mars πŸ™‚  Here’s what I think I am about to learn: there is a way to run without moving. 

Follow the Rabbi…

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2 comments

  1. just a thought on this whole zodiac thingee you’ve brought up…

    in this universe, created by our father, it is hard, at least for me, to miss that he’s fond of patterns.

    we see it in all of creation…

    we see galaxies that are very similar, and yet there’s such a wide variety.

    we see it here on our own planet in the animals and plants.

    we see it in ourselves, and we — like the god in whose image we were created — long to create and find patterns in our lives.

    we are constantly labeling the things around us, categorizing them, finding what’s similar and what’s different, and trying to sort out why those similarities and differences exist.

    we love to look at things that appear to have order.

    we instinctively flinch at chaos, in our lives, in our art, in our architecture, in our homes. (though we sometimes revel in chaos — i’m thinking of jackson pollack — we enjoy it as a break from order, not as the desirable norm)

    we *organize* everything we come in contact with — be it information, paper, concepts or systematic theologies. (some are more, or less, inclined to such organization, of course. but as a whole without pattern recognition and making we’d never be able to think and move in this world.)

    in such a universe, it is hard to discount those who have noticed that those born in certain times of year tend to display similar personality characteristics. such a system of describing human behavior was not invented in a vacuum, after all.

    as you pointed out, though, we who are disciples of jesus need not feel enslaved to our instinctive longings — whatever thier source — for we have him who refines us, him who sent the spirit of the living god who speaks to our hearts and counsels us in right behaviour — in godly behaviour.

    i think sticking it out is a wise decision, for what that’s worth.

    πŸ™‚

    luv you aido, congrats on yer anniversary!


  2. okay adria,
    this whole update once every 2 months thing isn’t working for me! update! update!



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